Monday, January 7, 2013


Today, I am keeping my blog short... and to the point.

We are faced with compromise all day, everyday. How we handle it, that is up to us.

I find myself facing compromise, the most, in my career. However, it also occurs with family, friends, and even when I am alone.

If you are making a decision and there is one hint of "oh, I don't know about that," you are compromising if you go through with it.

For me, acting and dancing can bring about compromise in all different forms. From a scene, language, the actions, the way I dress, the character I am playing, the meaning behind the show/movie, the way I dance, and the list goes on. Sure, I can get auditions all the time, but if any of those things are within the project, I know it isn't from the Lord.

People will argue with that. They may bring up the fact that this is a door opening, it is your dream project, etc. If it is my dream project, if it is the job the Lord wants me to have, THERE WILL BE ABSOLUTELY NO COMPROMISING because compromise isn't from the Lord.

I can know a group of celebrities, but they may be into doing things that aren't godly...BUT they could boost my career and get my name out there.
Who cares? God has more power than them. God is more popular than they are. He will get my name out there, in the right time, using HIS power.

I can have an audition where my character is as sexual as a porn star, so my career will skyrocket if I book it. Since it seems like a 'sex tape' is the easiest way to get famous now, I should do it!
WHO CARES?! Is that really a Christ-like project to be apart of? NO!

God will bless you for standing your ground and standing up for what you believe in.
"If you don't stand for something, you will fall for everything."

If it is a God ordained job, friendship, etc., there will be no sense of compromise. There will be only things of "life" spoken of. AND THOSE are the friends/projects that will prosper you and me in life because God is at the center.

James 4:17 ESV / 14 helpful votes

So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.

Friday, December 7, 2012


This morning I received a text message that said,

"When we strive to think like Him, speak like Him, see like Him, and feel like Him, everything else just falls into place." 

We have 24 hours in a day to get our needs done. When we add in our sleep time, we have around 16 hours left in a day. For me, I then add in school and I am down to about 12 hours. After that, I usually either spend time in church, in my career, with family and friends, or working out. Before you have time to stop and think, you are onto the next day. 

Everyday we have the opportunity to be like Him more and more. We are His light here on Earth. At times, we get so caught up in our problems, that we forget about His light. We forget how to speak like Him, see like Him, or to feel and love one another like Him. We aren't here to make our own schedules and live out the life we want for ourselves. We are here to be like Him... live our life like His. 

Alone you can do nothing; With Him... well that is when you can do everything. 

We need to S T R I V E to live like Him. Go out of our way to have a mind like our Father's. 

Philippians 2:1-11 

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, ...

 We are not our own; so we need to stop acting like it. 

Life here on Earth will be gone before we know it. We need to support one another in the call God has put on their life. We need to strive to treat others the way we wish to be treated. 

I had a wake-up call on this recently. I love to receive the love from others because I felt a lack of love in certain areas throughout the first 19 years of my life. However, it has come to the point that I won't be able to receive anymore love because I am keeping what I have received inside of me. I need to pour out that love onto others. I need to give back more than what people are giving me. I need to strive to love others before I do my first thing in the morning; before I eat my meals; before I go to school; before my life is over. 

As sad as this sounds, we could be spending our last few minutes here on Earth right now. Are you striving to live like Him? 

We all need those people who will show us that unconditional love time and time again, even when we shouldn't receive it. Thank you to Christian, my family, and my church family for going out of their way to be like Christ. 

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Ouch...That Hurt.

Monday evenings I assist a children's acting class. Those three hours spent with the kids are some of my favorite hours throughout the week. THEY, yes I said it...THEY teach ME so much. I love watching them from afar to see how their personalities carry them from one conversation to another. Another thing I learn from them is how to brush things off. Kids are constantly getting hurt or into trouble. Sure, they cry or scream, but come on...that literally only lasts a few minutes until someone loving comes along to assure them that their boo-boo will be okay. Then before you know it, they are back to giggling and loving every second they get. 

While playing a warm-up game with them yesterday, I cut my arm on an object. It was on the inner side of my right arm, at the crease of my elbow. Every time I moved my elbow, I could feel a pinch or a stretch. Not to mention, it was bleeding...and I don't do well with blood. 

Everyone experiences pain. Whether it be physical or emotional pain, it is still pain...and it always hurts us. 

When you ask men what they think of when they hear the word pain, most of them say something along the lines of an injury or some sort of physical pain. 

When you as ladies what they think of when they hear the word pain, most of them say something along the lines of a broken heart or some sort of emotional pain. 

Most people know this line from the song 'Stronger' by Kelly Clarkson:

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

I also agree that pain is put in our life for a reason. However, how we handle the pain is going to be the outcome. That 'reason' may not come to pass. 

Some people take pain on so horribly, that they cycle into depression or even hurt others. When I was going through a hard time a year or so ago, my mom told me a really good line that I have forever held in my heart...

Hurting people, hurt people. 

You might be in a situation where you are in so much emotional pain because someone has verbally or emotionally abused you, that it just tears you apart. You feel that you have no other way to respond to the pain but to be angry with those closest to you. Then they get hurt and the cycle continues. 

As much as we all struggle with pain, God doesn't want us to be upset, angry, or hurt. Yes, pain is apart of life. However, it is there to show us what really matters and to grow from it. 

I have dealt with my share of physical pain and emotional pain. From being almost paralyzed with my back to stressing my tendons in my foot and being on crutches to having those closest to me breaking my heart and tearing me down with their words. 

Pain isn't easy to deal with and I don't think it should be. If it was easy to deal with, nobody would grow from their experiences and be able to help others in need. 

How do I deal with pain? 
I am not one to talk to aloud to someone about my pain. (I know....that looks like a red flag!) I prefer to write about it. I love that because then when pain hits me later on, I can turn back to my old pain and see how much stronger I have become since then. I also enjoy writing my pain into songs. However, my favorite way to handle pain...

I turn to my Lord and Savior. The one who took on the worst pain so that I could have my life! When I think about all that Jesus went through before and as He was being hung on the Cross, that honestly makes all my pain disappear. Because I can't even IMAGINE how much that beating physically hurt Him. However, He did it because He loves me...and to me, that makes me so grateful for my life and makes me realize that my hurt is just a stepping stone in what my life will beautifully unfold to.

Whether it's a scratch on your arm or seeing your ex with someone new, we all experience wounds. It's just how we choose to heal them that makes all the difference. 

Psalm 34:18 The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Behind Closed Doors

It is really easy to become two different people in our lives. Sometimes we are even more than two people. We want to fit in with a certain group of people, so we act one way. We have to be accepted by our family, so we act another way. However, my personal favorite is who we are when no one else is watching.

I haven't posted on my blog in a couple of months because I had a really hard time figuring out what I wanted to write about. Last night, it totally hit me. Since 2012 started, I have been around some people that can impact your life in such a good way and then you see them turn around and impact your life in such a bad way. The worst part is, they don't even know they are impacting you in a bad way.

Which is why I hate social networking sites so much.

You see pictures of these people, surrounded by their friends, and all you can think about is who have they become.

Young adults have become so wrapped up in what people think about them. You can sit there and say that isn't true, but there is always that longing to be accepted. We want to fit in with a certain group of people. So, we will do whatever they are doing to be accepted.

Then, we venture home that night and have to hide that side from our parents. We know that they would never accept that side of, we morph into who they would want us to be.

The next stop is when we close our bedroom door.
That is who you really are.

What do you think about when you are all alone?

A lot of people tell me that I am a 'good girl' and I never do anything bad. That is simply because I don't want to. I don't want to have to act like someone else around a certain group of people. Because really, who are they? What are they going to do in my life that will make me a better or a more successful person?

When I was competing at Miss California's Outstanding Teen this past year, my onstage question was about whether or not parents should have access to their children's social networking sites. My answer was simply this:
"Yes, I do think parents should have the right to view the social networking sites that their children are partaking in. If the child is trying to hide something, that clearly means they shouldn't be doing it in the first place. So, I strongly think children should give their parents the right to view their social networking sites."

In my opinion, we should live our lives by that. If we are trying to hide something from someone, then that clearly means we shouldn't be doing whatever we are doing.

So, which person do you want to be?

1 Corinthians 12:27 
Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Beauty, Really?

When you look in the mirror, what do you see?
Do you feel beautiful? Ugly?

Being a teen girl is hard enough with school, friends, parents, boys, and the list goes on. For some reason, we always put an extra pressure on ourselves to be beautiful. We KILL ourselves to get that one boys attention or to hear the 3 words, "you look beautiful."

Whether it be in putting on more make-up, styling our hair a certain way, having the best clothes, or hardly eating, girls are constantly striving to be beautiful.

I think the biggest pressure girls put on themselves is to be thin.

We look at TV stars or Victoria Secret models and see their bodies...stick thin. We also see that guys are in awe of these girls. So, we think if we look like them, we can get a guys attention, too!

It may not be that you want to be thin for a guy; maybe it is because of your parents.

Your parents might tell you to loose weight or stop eating so much! Then you get upset and they say that they are just looking out for you and the cycle continues.

Some girls take things to extremes. You might become very cautious of what you are eating, record your calories, workout all the time, or even worse, fall into the trap of an eating disorder.

Being obsessive about your weight won't change a thing about what you're feeling in your heart. Your longing to feel beautiful won't be found by what you see in the mirror.

God created us in the perfect image of Him. We all have different flaws or things we don't like about our appearance... but God blessed us with those differences for a purpose.

I know for me, I have a very small figure. You can easily tell when I loose definition in my arms, stomach, or legs. Also, it is VERY obvious when I put on a few pounds. The worst part is, I AM OBSESSED WITH FOOD. I literally eat just because I am bored or think it is fun. Growing up, I kind of ate whatever I wanted and didn't see anything change in my body because I was always active with my running and dance. When I moved to California, I was no longer on a cross-country and track team, nor dance team. Yes, I still dance and run, but not like I used to. However, I kept eating the same way. Eventually the food caught up with my body and I began to fill out. Now, another problem... I eat when I am sad. Seeing that I was gaining weight, I became sad! WHICH MADE ME WANT TO EAT SOME COOKIE DOUGH ICE CREAM!!!!

One morning when I was reading my bible, I came across this verse:

You satisfy me more than the richest of foods. Psalms 63:5 (NLT)

That really spoke to me in the fact that Jesus should satisify me more than food. I don't have to constantly be thinking about food, I should be thinking about Him instead. 

Then, I came across this verse: 
The eyes of all look to you in hope; you give them their food as they need it. When you open your hand, you satisfy the hunger and thirst of every living thing. Psalms 145:15-16 (NLT)

For me, I was always opening my hands to grab food. However, it was my heart that I needed to open. I needed to open my heart and let God fill that constant need of food. 

I am still working on not always thinking about food. However, now when I get super hungry, I remember that Jesus went 40 days without food.... so I can go a few hours.  

Your body is a temple of the Lord. He created it to be what He wants it to be. Don't abuse it by not taking care of it. 

Now back to the topic of beauty. Beauty isn't defined by what you see when you look in the mirror. I looked at the dictionary definition, which stated: 

an individually pleasing or beautiful quality; grace; charm.

Beauty isn't defined by what you see when you look in the mirror. It is that one extra thing that comes from within. Your personality and happiness is what makes someone beautiful in my eyes. A girl who is happy with her appearance and doesn't compare herself to other girls, size wise, is a truly confident, beautiful lady. 

Embrace yourself, for the Lord created you to look different than everybody else. 

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Firmly Planted

When December first hit I immediately wondered what had happened to 2011. I still feel like we are in 2010. I almost felt like I had wasted an entire year of my life.

That day, as I sat down to read my bible, it became aware to me that 2011 was my growing year. God knew that I needed to grow up mentally and physically. Turning 18 and becoming a legal adult means that technically I am on my own and need to start being independent.

I don't know... but that scared me.

This past week has been a huge dance week for me. I got called into five different dance auditions. Dance auditions are different then acting ones. For acting, you audition and then wait for a call. When it comes to dance, you typically get typed cast first. Which means that the choreographer looks at you and determines if you look the part. They will either ask you to stay or leave. Then if you make it past that round, you learn the combo, audition in small groups, then they ask you to stay or leave. They continue that process until they get it down to the final group that they cast.

I think that dance auditions are more imitating then acting because you get told yes or no right to your face.
Through growing my thick skin, I have also gained a lot of understanding when it comes to "my path."

It says numerous times in the bible that God has a path created for you, that leads you directly to Him. He knows all about you even before you are born.

Thinking about that, for me, is mind blowing. Someone actually knows where you will be in 12 hours, 34 minutes, and 17 seconds. THAT IS CRAZY!

I have been able to turn that thought into my career. Understanding that when I get "cut" at an audition, it is all apart of God's plan for my life. I have to accept it, put it behind me, and move on.

God really does know what you can and can't do in your life because of the future He has created for you.

A perfect example was when I was competing at Miss California's Outstanding Teen. It wasn't up to me whether or not I won. It was up to God and I accepted that He will determine my fate. It worked out perfectly in the fact that I didn't win. If you win, you go onto compete at Miss America's Outstanding Teen. The same week that the national pageant was, I was shooting G L E E. God knew I couldn't win because He was going to use me in another way!

Going back to my first few sentences when mentioning about year has gone somewhere. Every step I take is a step closer to seeing my Father. Every time I get cut at an audition, I have to trust that my feet will guide me to something better along my path.
My feet cannot waiver. They cannot shake. They cannot take a step back. For God is with me and will guide and direct me in the way HE wants me to walk. Not the way I want.

What is going on in your life? Has something not gone your way? How did you react? Did you get upset and have a negative attitude the rest of the day. Then you are taking a step back on your path. God makes all things work together for YOUR good. He isn't out to hurt you or make you upset.

The last thing He wants is for you to be in a bad mood. You have no idea when your feet will run out of room on your path. It might be in 50 years, 10 years, 5 months, 3 weeks, tonight. We have no control over your path.

People ask me all the time how I can be so positive when I am dealing with the things in my life. A lot of people ask me this after being cut at an audition and wonder why I handle rejection so well. It is a simple answer for me.
I don't know when my last breath will be, so I am not going to waste my current breaths by being upset or down. You shouldn't either.

Trust each step God forces your feet to take. Whether you like it or not, it will eventually work out with God's will.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Don't Disqualify Yourself

Have you ever stopped in the pitch dark and complete silence, when you are all alone to listen to God's words? I think that is when you are the most raw. Nothing to distract you. However, life is full of distractions.

All of us have a starting line. It was created before we were born, and we were able to take our first step across it when we were born. Every individuals race is different.

For me, I was in and out of the hospital many times when I was a child. From having a cyst at birth to having a hernia at 3 months.

I immediately started my race with some trials.

As I started to grow and form into a child, my race began to smooth out. I was doing well in school, dance, and even gained a new love of running in 3rd grade.

When middle school began, I had a little bit of a harder time in school because I put my focus more on dance and running. However, I quickly learned that some "things" need to be rearranged in my order of priorities!

High school has been a different experience for me than it is for most teenagers. Going to a charter school, basically teaching myself, has taught me a lot! A whole new level of time management, that is for sure! Of course I am still running and dancing, but I also picked up a new love of acting.

While I was in my high school years, God "blessed" me with a storm. Well, many storms. It began with my back. Having severe scoliosis has changed my life. Having a severe multifactorial disorder that only affects 68,000 people in the United States leaves me speechless. Living within a plastic cast gave me a new appreciation for disabilities. Along with that, I dealt with my aunt dying from breast cancer within 4 weeks of finding out she was diagnosed. On top of that, I am going through all of the teenage problems and family situations.

If you look back at the start of that paragraph, I said that God "blessed" me with a storm. Yes, I consider all of those things to be a blessing.

Romans 8:28 reads:
And we know that God causes all things to work together for the good of those that love God and are called according to His purpose for them.

Matthew 15:28 reads:
Jesus said to her, "Women, you have great faith! Your request is granted." And her daughter was healed at that moment.

John 20:27 reads:
Stop doubting and believe.

Matthew 17:7 reads:
..."Get up," he said. "Don't be afraid..."

Matthew 17:20 reads:
"You don't have enough faith," Jesus told them. "I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it would move. NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE."

Those are a few of my favorite bible verses.

Once we step over that starting line, we are putting our trust in the Lord to lead us according to His plan for our life. Are you letting Him?

Even if trials come into your life, you have to remember God put them there for a reason.

You have to learn how to handle the curves, hills, and the occasional punch in the stomach. Sometimes we disqualify ourselves from the race. We don't think we can handle it or we give up. Hey, we can't give up, we have to rise up. When challenge arises, grab that opportunity to turn things around in your life.

God has an assignment for you to live out. Be bold, courageous, obedient, and determined.
Put on the armour of God and prepare for battle. However, you will notice there isn't much armour for your backside. That is because you aren't supposed to run away from battle, you are supposed to run straight into it.

Don't disqualify yourself. Imagine the light you will see after the storm passes. Rise up and reach for that light.